“I can change. I can live out my imagination instead of my memory. I can tie myself to my limitless potential instead of my limiting past.” ~ Stephen R. Covey
What if you were told that you had just a few more hours remaining before you died, and if you wanted to live you would have to give up the one thing that you hold most dear to your heart? That sounds like a radical change, doesn’t it? It is hard to imagine that one would not choose life instead of death.
What if your family was at the edge of an emotional cliff and was about to ‘helter-skelter’ to the bottom and all you needed to do to save yourselves was to drop your bad attitude and the baggage of your past? If that was all it took to gain your life back, difficult as it may be – you might try to work on your behavior to change it so that you can be free to live.
A few days ago I was looking at the Lifetime Network TV program “America’s Supernanny: Family Lockdown.” While I agree to the seriousness of the different family cases that are presented each time, and hope for the best end result, it often involves techniques that in many instances are considered radical and revolutionary. Deborah Tillman is as tough as you can get and she is no easy walk in the park when it comes to discipline and laying down the rules.
Ms. Debra as she is affectionately called on the show had her work cut out for her with this family of six – a Mom, now single having gone through a very traumatic separation and divorce and who is now raising her five children on her own. At the very start of the episode, there was so much deep hurt from open wounds of the past and children who were saddened, angry and each in his/her own way had so much negative outbursts of what I believe to be the after effects from separation and divorce and through losing their Dad from home.
Matters became even more complicated once Ms. Debra was informed by the Mom that the older of the two boys was suffering from PTSD, a condition that he was also receiving therapy for. It was certainly a ‘game’ changer – the strategy that is had to be different. A touch and go, as if holding a blade sharpened on both sides in your hands. Everyone in the family were asked to give up something they loved (TV, Computer Games, and other electronic devices) while under Ms. Debra’s ‘Lockdown.’
The resolve in the end I thought was extremely brilliant and empowering. Ms. Debra added the “Potty Mouth” and “Releasing the Rocks Techniques” to her usual “Calm Down Corner Technique,” all of which in my view represent the internalization and putting into practice
correct principles upon which enduring happiness and success are based. What a powerful paradigm shift it was. One by one, every negative emotions of the past bottled on the inside were written upon individual rocks and released by throwing them far away into the sea as a sign of their new found peace and freedom.
The moral behind this true story for me follows:
A heightened awareness to negative behavior and problems in ones’ life is the single most essential key to change. There has to be a willingness also and a desire for change. Change is much easier to manage when you partner with others for total intervention. Some behaviors will need to be unlearned and subsequently taught/re-learned. Anger must be managed and controlled, if not it controls you. What follow if not controlled would be highly undesirable and unwanted behavioral patterns.
It is said that a tree is easier bent into shape when it is young and tender than when it is old and full grown. Likewise, we owe it to our children to train them up in the way that they should grow, and train them up in the fear and admonition of the Lord so that when they become older they do not depart from that training instilled. It is never the right thing to tolerate and reward bad behavior. Discipline must be enforced, consequences for bad behavior must be communicated and quickly affirm and reward that which is positive!
Food for thought:
Is there something in your life you might be willing to change or is there something you might be willing to give another try? More than that, “Change. It has the power to uplift, to heal, to stimulate, to surprise, open new doors, bring fresh experience and create excitement in life. Certainly it is worth the risk.” ~ Leo Buscuglia
Photo credit: mylifetime.com