Traditionally, for Father’s Day each year, fathers have received gifts from their children such as ties, tool kits, designer socks and shirts, fishing poles, just to name a few. But not so this year according to a CNN Contributor Ruben Navarrette, Jr. in an article he wrote entitled, “Fathers, stop coddling your kids.”
Speaking from his perspective and for some of the Dads that he has spoken to over the years, he said, “What many of us really want for Father’s Day is an attitude adjustment for our kids.” Without prejudice, I have to concur with the author’s opinion. I agree wholeheartedly that we are living in an age where many parents are struggling with raising their toddlers and/or teenagers.
Parents struggle with matters such as discipline for when a child act out of context and fail to follow the rules. Many children go around with an attitude as if you [the adult] are the child, and they are the parents. They do everything they can to thwart and twist you around their little fingers.
They throw tantrums for no apparent reasons. Many act irresponsible, seemingly buying into the notion that parents owe them something. The many times we the parent have to say, ‘clean up your room,’ ‘do the dishes,’ it’s as if you are talking to a brick wall.
What are really the consequences for such behaviour, when the truth be told, we end up doing the dishes and picking up after them, yet their hands are still anointed with their weekly allowances.
What are we really teaching them? Is it true to say that many times we pamper them, and reward children for their bad behavior? Well, one kid had a rude awakening while his dad I believe has set a precedence. Here is the excerpt from Navarrette’s article:
“One day, my friend said, he walked into his house and casually told his teenage son that he needed some help with some minor chore outside. The son, who had been playing video games, was clearly bothered. Exasperated, he said, “Dad, whenever you ask me to do stuff like this, it’s just such an inconvenience.”
“Showing more restraint than I would have at the moment, my friend calmly apologized to his son for disturbing him. Then he picked up the phone, and fired his landscaper. Next, my friend sat down at the computer and ordered a gift for his son: a brand new lawnmower. This summer, the teenager — who is now responsible for doing all the yard work at the family home — is learning the true meaning of the word, “inconvenience.”
Navarrette’s own children are just 8, 6 and 4, and is perhaps too young to go online and read what their dad wrote. But according to Navarrette, he is already getting more comfortable with making demands on them. Here is what he said they can all give to him this Father’s Day and the ones to come:
[[ “I want each of them to stop acting like an only child, and learn to share everything with their siblings, including their parent’s time and attention;
I want them to get out of their heads this corrosive ideas that the world revolves around them, and all that matters at any given moment of the day is what they want, need or feel; and
I want them to treat people better, starting with their family members, and then moving on to complete strangers, and not look down on anyone — ever.”]] read the entire article here
I sincerely applaud these dads for taking a stand, which hopefully, many others will take example from.